Three ways to rescue kids from self-entitlement

Samantha’s Salt
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   My 8-year-old son recently purchased his long awaited fidget spinner from his allowance money. His eyes were delighted, he learned new tricks, and showed it off to his friends.
    Then about a day later, that black old fidget spinner became familiar to him. I even found it neglected on the living room floor. Nothing was wrong with it, but he came to me and said, “Mom, I want another fidget spinner. A rainbow, glow-in-the dark one — like the one at the grocery store.”
    I stared into his big brown eyes. I knew exactly what he was getting at. He wanted the better and brighter one. The black one just wasn’t as exciting anymore.
    “John, you’ve neglected the one you bought. You haven’t taken care of it. You don’t need another one. I’m sorry, but no.”
    This little incident reminded me of the incessant craving for “more.” It creeps in so subtly in our own adult hearts and we spot it in our children too.  
    This reality that, I am self-entitled to what I want, when I want, at whatever cost. And, I deserve it.
    As parents, we all want nothing but our child’s happiness, pleasure and delight, but in our journey we must create boundaries — where a line is drawn in the sand to protect them from self-entitlement, self-destruction and this false reality that the world revolves around “Me, myself and I.”
    This is no easy task as we live in a culture that eats, sleeps and breathes independence, idolatry of self and a lack of consideration for others. But even more so, every day we’re engaged in a battle with our own sinful hearts that wake up coveting the phone screen, Amazon deal, fitness product, bigger house, better car and more.
    To think our children are not engaged in this battle is foolish. The fight for their hearts is alive and well, too. So, how do we help them with their own cravings and lusts of the flesh? How do we give them the discipline and boundaries they desperately need? Here are just a few ways:
    1. Say “no” to your child.
    The word “no” will not hurt your child. It will help them see that the world does not revolve around their wants, desires and cravings for more. Withholding a toy, treat, new gadget or play date with a friend doesn’t mean you don’t love them. It speaks that you know what is best for them in the right timing.
    You know what will affect them emotionally, physically and spiritually. You have the power to use your “nos” and “yeses” with great discernment. Your “nos” will help them see that they don’t get everything they want and that’s a good thing. These lessons will carry with them through their whole life.
    “But let your ‘yes’ be ‘yes,’ and your ‘no,’ ‘no.’ For whatever is more than these is from the evil one.” — Matthew 5:37

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